little miss sunshine turns gloomy

its been 21 years of fighting and keeping my walls standing still... but i guess my strength is not enough to keep my stand.... I'm one of those people who try so hard to thinks that they're strong enough that we never needed anyone to be there for us but the next thing i knew is that I'm already falling from that hill.. i remember what my friend Melissa told me before "even little miss sunshine needs to be gloomy sometimes!!".Lowering such defenses is a big risk you might lose control of your life but how long would you keep on running, keep on turning away from everything instead of facing it and take all the bullet we might not able to survive but what matters most is that before we fall and fail we were strong enough to face reality. love just isn't safe... i'm not safe but that's okay at least I've been happy..i know how hard it is to hang on a thread my walls are breaking, its too close its more than i can take i'm just tired of running and hiding.. how hard it is when everything keeps on hindering you from your happiness all you can do is just wait for that moment that perfect moment to escape and grab on.... and by then you might be able to escape and have what you want........ tkae it from me... coz i wasn't able to escape and now i'm still trying to have ny 2nd attempt.... and i wish i could....