Wont let him control me anymore. I can't. On a subconscious level, since the death, even without any contact with him, he has been in control of my thoughts and my actions. I am ready to let go of him completely.. I am ready to, I want to.... if only someone could tell me how. How Can I stop my heart from aching every time I think of him? How can I stop my mind from racing into all of the things I should have done whenever someone brings up his name?
Its been over for years now... but the pain of it all still lingers around me.. My heart is damaged because of him. I Know what I need to do, and this whole time I have known what I need to do, I just need to let it all go, but I dont know how to let it all go.. I dont want to forget about it completly.. the truth is he was my first love, and not everything was terrible.. I believe there was a time when we both loved eachother the same way... or at least I would like to believe in that. How can I let go of the painful parts without letting go of the things that made me smile.. and is it possible to ever remember the things that made me smile without feeling the sting of losing everything I spent so long fighting for? Maybe today I need a little bit of advice.. I just want to be free from the pain in my heart over him.. he has no right anymore to be in my head controling any part of my thoughts and I dont want it.
The truth is he will never change and I Know that, but I have changed and I will continue to change and learn and grow as a person.. this means that I dont need him..in any way anymore, my life has run its course of him and now I want all the pain that I have felt over him to leave and I Dont want to feel it anymore.. When I move on to love someone new again, I dont want any part of that to suffer because of the way my heart was broken in the past, I Dont want to not be able to let someone in because of MJ, I can't do it anymore.. I don't want to.
Truth be told, not that its been anything that is completly out of control, but everything has to start somewhere, and now at this point, im saying, no more. I dont need that lifestyle in any sense of what it means, I do need to follow in the footsteps of my mother as much as I love her, even she dosent want me to become like she once was and I always vowed to myself that I never would and I refuse to mess that up, this is my life and I want great things from it. I have every intention of getting all of those great things in ways that are honest and wholesome.
One day Ill find that guy who I am really ment to spend my life with, though I thought I already found him , a lifetime ago when I was far more nieve than I consider myself to be today.. but I was wrong. and I know that now. Whoever he is I will find him when the time is right and when I do I will open my heart to the love that is there and cherish it in all the ways that I know how to.
Miyerkules, Hulyo 20, 2011
A Letter For You
Dear You,
We had a time where we thought the world was ours, where our love could conquer anything, and that we would stay together till the end of time. We were invincible. We had it all, and we watched as it fell apart, you with tainted eyes, and me with tears. There was a time where I would dedicate the sappiest love song to you, and now all I can think of is our mistakes.You threw me away, over and over and I let you back in over and over. It was my mistake, but we were a mistake. A beautiful wonderful mistake that I wouldn't take back if the world depended on it. Because I love you, I will always love you, and even though I was angry, I'm not, I am hurt, I will always be hurt by your decision to cheat on me, I will always be hurt that you weren't the one to tell me what had happened, and that when I confronted you with it, you played it off.
But good things always come to an end, and the love we had will come again, and it's taken me this long to realize that and I hope one day you will find the one that you think is worthy enough of all you have to offer.
Sincerely,
Me
We had a time where we thought the world was ours, where our love could conquer anything, and that we would stay together till the end of time. We were invincible. We had it all, and we watched as it fell apart, you with tainted eyes, and me with tears. There was a time where I would dedicate the sappiest love song to you, and now all I can think of is our mistakes.You threw me away, over and over and I let you back in over and over. It was my mistake, but we were a mistake. A beautiful wonderful mistake that I wouldn't take back if the world depended on it. Because I love you, I will always love you, and even though I was angry, I'm not, I am hurt, I will always be hurt by your decision to cheat on me, I will always be hurt that you weren't the one to tell me what had happened, and that when I confronted you with it, you played it off.
But good things always come to an end, and the love we had will come again, and it's taken me this long to realize that and I hope one day you will find the one that you think is worthy enough of all you have to offer.
Sincerely,
Me
My Sanctuary
I decided to put myself back inside my box. I guess I'm just not ready to face the world after all. I miss my box. Of course, it will never be the same inside of it, having glimpsed the Hell we call humanity. My box is just big enough to fit me in it a couple times. Chains wrap around my ankles. He tried to tell me to stay. He asked if we could lock ourselves in a box together. Why? So he can leave. The thought of my safe place falling apart terrifies me. Just the thought of watching it crumble and fall between my fingers makes me want to cry out in pain.
So here I go again. Into my box with the one-way glass walls and ceiling. I can watch as humanity slowly unravels itself further. I can laugh because I will know that I had nothing to do with that world. I'll watch as people suffer from hearbreak. And then decide to "love" once again. And it goes on and on. A never - ending cycle that I want to have nothing to do with. I close myself inside this box. Away from any pain. Away from any human contact. I don't need either. The only presence I should feel is God. That's all I want to feel. No more heart break. No more anything. I'm locking myself away. Putting an end to everything I shouldn't be feeling at this age.
I will admit to one thing. I will miss him. He made me smile. He made me cry. Yet I still love him. This is what I am protecting myself from. People like him. Those who cared once upon a time, and then changed their mind. People who throw around a sacred word that I can't stand to tell anyone anymore. He hurt me...so bad. I don't think I will ever fully recover. But I know, if I stay in my box, my Sanctuary, people like him can never hurt me again.
In my box is another smaller, more precious box. It holds my best friend. Silver and sharp. Always there. My best friend would never leave me. He is always in the same place. He helps me when I need relief. He would never hurt me. He is my pocket knife that I love so dearly.
And if I ever think about coming out of my box, well, that's what the chains are for. They hold me to the ground. They keep me inside. Even if I beg to leave. The chains are formed out of the links. The links are formed out of memories. All I will ever have to do is look downa and remember everything...everyone...who ever hurt me. Who ever tried to hurt me. I will remember every Hello; and every Good-Bye that followed.
I'm scared. I'm scarred. I didn't know what to do. All I remembered is dreaming. Dreaming about everyone I know in a room. Me in the center. I was always crying. I was always hurt. It would have helped to have a friend to talk to. But I kept turning in circles, looking at everyone. They all, one - by - one, turned their backs and left. And there I was. In an empty room. As alone in this world as the day I came out of my box. That's why I decide to go back.
Slowly, my heart will heal. But I will never forget what this world had done to me. It tore me down. Day. After. Day. After. Day. I will never forgive it for that. Never. So here I go World. I'm glad you had a good time destroying me...
So here I go again. Into my box with the one-way glass walls and ceiling. I can watch as humanity slowly unravels itself further. I can laugh because I will know that I had nothing to do with that world. I'll watch as people suffer from hearbreak. And then decide to "love" once again. And it goes on and on. A never - ending cycle that I want to have nothing to do with. I close myself inside this box. Away from any pain. Away from any human contact. I don't need either. The only presence I should feel is God. That's all I want to feel. No more heart break. No more anything. I'm locking myself away. Putting an end to everything I shouldn't be feeling at this age.
I will admit to one thing. I will miss him. He made me smile. He made me cry. Yet I still love him. This is what I am protecting myself from. People like him. Those who cared once upon a time, and then changed their mind. People who throw around a sacred word that I can't stand to tell anyone anymore. He hurt me...so bad. I don't think I will ever fully recover. But I know, if I stay in my box, my Sanctuary, people like him can never hurt me again.
In my box is another smaller, more precious box. It holds my best friend. Silver and sharp. Always there. My best friend would never leave me. He is always in the same place. He helps me when I need relief. He would never hurt me. He is my pocket knife that I love so dearly.
And if I ever think about coming out of my box, well, that's what the chains are for. They hold me to the ground. They keep me inside. Even if I beg to leave. The chains are formed out of the links. The links are formed out of memories. All I will ever have to do is look downa and remember everything...everyone...who ever hurt me. Who ever tried to hurt me. I will remember every Hello; and every Good-Bye that followed.
I'm scared. I'm scarred. I didn't know what to do. All I remembered is dreaming. Dreaming about everyone I know in a room. Me in the center. I was always crying. I was always hurt. It would have helped to have a friend to talk to. But I kept turning in circles, looking at everyone. They all, one - by - one, turned their backs and left. And there I was. In an empty room. As alone in this world as the day I came out of my box. That's why I decide to go back.
Slowly, my heart will heal. But I will never forget what this world had done to me. It tore me down. Day. After. Day. After. Day. I will never forgive it for that. Never. So here I go World. I'm glad you had a good time destroying me...
define love
what is love ??? Very cliche, I know, but most of us will have had this big question in our heads at a certain time in our lives. (or maybe the same question comes in different forms in different phases of life? ) Whatever it is, you think you know what you want from life, and you are ‘in control’ and along comes this question “define love”..and you say oh yes…i know what love is…”true love” as they show in the films…”real love” as you thought you had felt…and you start typing..and you suddenly feel at a loss to explain what you feel about love.
Sometimes you just go …bah!…it’s all crap…just a concept that doesn’t really take form…but then we do need someone in our lives don’t we? Someone to share everything with? Is it not love that bonds us then? Or is it the compelling necessity of companionship that brings us together. Being in love makes you dependent, it makes you vulnerable…is that true??
Sometimes you just go …bah!…it’s all crap…just a concept that doesn’t really take form…but then we do need someone in our lives don’t we? Someone to share everything with? Is it not love that bonds us then? Or is it the compelling necessity of companionship that brings us together. Being in love makes you dependent, it makes you vulnerable…is that true??
Then one person made me realize the answer and it was "mr. ideal" and i learned this:
You think about yourself, get to know yourself, build yourself up to be so strong that u are confident that u can handle your own life, that u don’t need anyone, that no one can hurt u without ur permission, that you are the master of your own life, and then, u meet someone… who makes u want to surrender all of yourself, without hesitation, when you become ready to lay yourself totally open in front of him/her, all your vulnerabilities, your fears, your dreams, your weaknesses, your wishes and ambitions and principles, things that make you think and feel and wonder and laugh and cry, when the tiniest of his/her unhappiness zoom straight inside your heart, when you feel like bringing the whole world at his/her feet, just to make him/her happy, when you are ready to give him/her all the freedom and right over your life, comfortable in the knowing that the other person is so strong that he/she will honour you, the you that you’ve opened up, & will never take advantage of your openness… will care for you because he/she wants to, not because it’s supposed to be that way, when adjustment doesn’t feel like adjustment, when u willingly make yourself flexible for his/her sake, when the freedom between you makes your relationship stronger, when u both start feeling that u need each other, not because u lack something, but because of how much both of you enjoy being part of one another’s lives, & both of you want to practically take it forward,
And I agree with this. I’m not quite “learned” enough to “profess” anything, but yes, i feel love is learning to love yourself, knowing that you are strong enough to survive anything life throws at you, and then finding someone who you don’t mind being vulnerable with, because you trust him/her enough, and you are comfortable enough to shed all ego barriers
You think about yourself, get to know yourself, build yourself up to be so strong that u are confident that u can handle your own life, that u don’t need anyone, that no one can hurt u without ur permission, that you are the master of your own life, and then, u meet someone… who makes u want to surrender all of yourself, without hesitation, when you become ready to lay yourself totally open in front of him/her, all your vulnerabilities, your fears, your dreams, your weaknesses, your wishes and ambitions and principles, things that make you think and feel and wonder and laugh and cry, when the tiniest of his/her unhappiness zoom straight inside your heart, when you feel like bringing the whole world at his/her feet, just to make him/her happy, when you are ready to give him/her all the freedom and right over your life, comfortable in the knowing that the other person is so strong that he/she will honour you, the you that you’ve opened up, & will never take advantage of your openness… will care for you because he/she wants to, not because it’s supposed to be that way, when adjustment doesn’t feel like adjustment, when u willingly make yourself flexible for his/her sake, when the freedom between you makes your relationship stronger, when u both start feeling that u need each other, not because u lack something, but because of how much both of you enjoy being part of one another’s lives, & both of you want to practically take it forward,
And I agree with this. I’m not quite “learned” enough to “profess” anything, but yes, i feel love is learning to love yourself, knowing that you are strong enough to survive anything life throws at you, and then finding someone who you don’t mind being vulnerable with, because you trust him/her enough, and you are comfortable enough to shed all ego barriers
My Heart's Melody
Ever tried listening to old genre of songs? Well I have a short story to tell you about this. This morning at about 5:30 am when I was about to sleep I turn on my radio to find some soothing melodies that would bring me to sleep. I found this station where they play old songs every Sunday.
As I was listening to the music the DJ just read a letter about a girl who was in love with his friend but never had a chance of telling his friend what she feels. as the DJ reads the letter I can’t help but to notice the background song guess what it was the song sang by Mr.Manilow.
Well ever since I was a little kid I really love to listen to old songs then suddenly I remember that song which I used to sing every time I see my mom crying. That goes like this “through the years you never let me down you turned my life around the sweetest day I found I found with you through the years I’ve never been afraid I love the life we’ve made I’m so glad I stayed right here with you through the years” it wouldn’t fail me every time I sing this my mom would stop crying and hug me.
I never really understand how those kind of music can mend broken hearts until this morning. Those songs where not just songs they were emotions written on a paper which was given a melody to make the emotions more realistic. It helps you cover up fears in the name of love or playing safe when life isn’t easy. It helps you to say goodbye ,to see what you can’t see. Helps you undo the damage that has been done.
My mom once told me that world darkens now and then but It just no telling when but it would be bright again. What is the connection of this quote on my topic? The answer is simple emotions might be overwhelming at times but there would be a day when everything will come to their proper places.
Everything in this world has a deeper meaning such as songs which we love to listen to and fortunately for me. I realize this things I mean I’ve had spent my life looking for answers but never realizing that the answers to my questions are just in front of me. We are just afraid of accepting the consequences and taking the risk so we decide not to answer certain things. But remember things left unsaid, unanswered or disregarded are the things that matters the most.
Weird isn’t it by merely listening to old songs this morning I came up with this things… Why not try to listen to those kind of songs who knows you might just end up like me reminiscing the past while appreciating the values and lessons I’ve learned…..
As I was listening to the music the DJ just read a letter about a girl who was in love with his friend but never had a chance of telling his friend what she feels. as the DJ reads the letter I can’t help but to notice the background song guess what it was the song sang by Mr.Manilow.
Well ever since I was a little kid I really love to listen to old songs then suddenly I remember that song which I used to sing every time I see my mom crying. That goes like this “through the years you never let me down you turned my life around the sweetest day I found I found with you through the years I’ve never been afraid I love the life we’ve made I’m so glad I stayed right here with you through the years” it wouldn’t fail me every time I sing this my mom would stop crying and hug me.
I never really understand how those kind of music can mend broken hearts until this morning. Those songs where not just songs they were emotions written on a paper which was given a melody to make the emotions more realistic. It helps you cover up fears in the name of love or playing safe when life isn’t easy. It helps you to say goodbye ,to see what you can’t see. Helps you undo the damage that has been done.
My mom once told me that world darkens now and then but It just no telling when but it would be bright again. What is the connection of this quote on my topic? The answer is simple emotions might be overwhelming at times but there would be a day when everything will come to their proper places.
Everything in this world has a deeper meaning such as songs which we love to listen to and fortunately for me. I realize this things I mean I’ve had spent my life looking for answers but never realizing that the answers to my questions are just in front of me. We are just afraid of accepting the consequences and taking the risk so we decide not to answer certain things. But remember things left unsaid, unanswered or disregarded are the things that matters the most.
Weird isn’t it by merely listening to old songs this morning I came up with this things… Why not try to listen to those kind of songs who knows you might just end up like me reminiscing the past while appreciating the values and lessons I’ve learned…..
Linggo, Hulyo 17, 2011
rejected???
One thing I know about rejection is that it feels real. And even though it rarely is real, it sure feels that way. Why is it rarely real?
First let's look at - what is rejection? It looks like someone decides they don't want to spend time, money, or share their heart with us. A person seemingly rejects us in favor of someone or something else. Or so it seems at first glance. What makes rejection seemingly hurt so much is that we perceive it to be a rejection of us personally. As a person, a human being.
One of the definitions of rejection is to deny. The one we take personally is to discard as defective or useless. That one zings right into our hearts. One thing I know for certain -- absolutely no one on this earth can tell you that you're defective or useless. Well, they can tell you but you can reject their comment. The real pain behind rejection is that we think someone is saying we aren't worthy. We are defective or useless. Guess what, it's a lie.
You aren't defective, flawed or useless. Why is it a lie? No one is defective or useless. If we are breathing we have an opportunity to be quite useful and if there is something we want to change about our lives, we can do that. No one is defective. Why do you think that the other persons behavior is about you? It isn't. It's about them. Always.
It's about what works and doesn't work for them. And if you don't work for someone, I guarantee you that you will work for someone else. And someone else will work better for you. And if someone can make you feel defective, then underneath you feel that way, otherwise you would reject that thought. You aren't defective. That's the truth.
So if this is a recurring theme in your life, then start right now to heal it.
Begin by listing all the wonderful qualities you have. Then ask friends and family what it is they appreciate and like about you. Then look back on past relationships and honestly ask yourself where the man was in his life when he rejected you? What was going on in his life? What kind of man was he really?
Often we love someone and know they are truly a good person, but their behavior is awful. Or maybe they just aren't available, so they can't be in a relationship. Maybe they came from an abusive home and they don't know how to love, or communicate.
Most of us didn't learn how to be in healthy, thriving relationships. We learned our relationship skills at home and often they weren't the best models.
It's your choice whether you want to feel rejected or you want to accept that it wasn't the best person for you or vice versa. There isn't anything wrong in either case. No one is wrong, defective or useless. It just wasn't a good fit.
So don't feel badly about yourself. You're a Goddess!
If you want some help working through any old rejection patterns, give me a call or get some help from another source. Don't hold on to it any longer.
When you love yourself, when you feel good about yourself, when you let yourself and others have what is needed, you will feel free.
So love yourself, see your goodness, honor your Goddess. imagine the possibilities....
Huwebes, Hulyo 07, 2011
Written By a GUY
We guys don't care if you talk to other guys.
We don't care if you're friends with other guys.
But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks into the room and you jump up and tackle him, without even introducing us, yeah, it pisses us off.
It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without even acknowledging the fact that we're still there.
We don't care if a guy calls or texts you, but at 2 in the morning we do get a little concerned.
Nothing is that important at 2am that it can't wait till the morning.
Also, when we tell you you're pretty/beautiful/gorgeous/cute/stunning, we freakin' mean it.
Don't tell us we're wrong.
We'll stop trying to convince you.
The sexiest thing about a girl is confidence.
Yeah, you can quote me.
Don't be mad when we hold the door open.
Take advantage of the mood I'm in.
Let us pay for you ! Don't feel bad. We enjoy doing it.
It's expected.
Smile and say thank you.
Kiss us when no one's watching.
If you kiss us when you know somebody's looking, we'll be more impressed.
You don't have to get dressed up for us.
If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't have to feel the need to wear the shortest skirt you have or put on every kind of make-up you own.
We like you for who you are and not what you are.
Honestly, I think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her pj's.
Or my t-shirt and boxers, not all dolled up.
Don't take everything we say seriously.
Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. See the beauty in it.
Don't get angry easily.
Stop using magazines/media as your bible.
Don't talk about how hot Chris Brown, Brad Pitt, or Jesse McCartney is in front of us.
It's boring, and we don't care. You have girlfriends for that.
Whatever happened to the word "handsome"/'beautiful"I'd be utterly stunned by a girl who greeted me with "Hey handsome!" instead of "Hey baby/stud/cutie/sexy" or whatever else you can think of.
On the other hand I'm not saying I wouldn't like it either.
Girls, I cannot stress this enough: if you aren't being treated right by a guy, don't wait for him to change!
Ditch his sorry butt, disgrace to the male population, and find someone who will treat you with utter respect. Someone who will honor your morals.
Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest.
Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes.
Someone who will love you, no matter how bad you make them feel.
Someone who will stop what they're doing just to look you in the eyes and say I love you and actually mean it.
Give the nice guys a chance.
Guys repost this if you agree.
Girls repost this if you think it's cute.
Every guy who isn't a jerk will agree with this, so we hope that all the girls that read this will repost this.
ADVICE:
*Holding Hands*
-Girls: If you want to hold his hand, gently bump into it a couple of times.
*Movies*
-Girls: During a movie, if he puts his arm around you, tilt your head on his shoulder.
-Guys: Lift her chin up and kiss her.
*Loving each other*
-Guys: When she tells you she loves you, look deep into her eyes, give her a peck on the lips, and tell her you love her too and mean it.
*Laying below the stars*
-Girls: When you're both laying under the stars, put your head on his chest and close your eyes as you listen to his steady heartbeat.
-Guys: Whisper in her ear and link your hands with hers.
By 12am tonight, your one true love will realize how much they want you if you forward this on.
Guys forward this if you agree, girls forward this if you think it's cute.
Girls, repost this as: Written by a guy ♥
Boys, repost this as: Girls need to realize ♥
We don't care if you're friends with other guys.
But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks into the room and you jump up and tackle him, without even introducing us, yeah, it pisses us off.
It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without even acknowledging the fact that we're still there.
We don't care if a guy calls or texts you, but at 2 in the morning we do get a little concerned.
Nothing is that important at 2am that it can't wait till the morning.
Also, when we tell you you're pretty/beautiful/gorgeous/cute/stunning, we freakin' mean it.
Don't tell us we're wrong.
We'll stop trying to convince you.
The sexiest thing about a girl is confidence.
Yeah, you can quote me.
Don't be mad when we hold the door open.
Take advantage of the mood I'm in.
Let us pay for you ! Don't feel bad. We enjoy doing it.
It's expected.
Smile and say thank you.
Kiss us when no one's watching.
If you kiss us when you know somebody's looking, we'll be more impressed.
You don't have to get dressed up for us.
If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't have to feel the need to wear the shortest skirt you have or put on every kind of make-up you own.
We like you for who you are and not what you are.
Honestly, I think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her pj's.
Or my t-shirt and boxers, not all dolled up.
Don't take everything we say seriously.
Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. See the beauty in it.
Don't get angry easily.
Stop using magazines/media as your bible.
Don't talk about how hot Chris Brown, Brad Pitt, or Jesse McCartney is in front of us.
It's boring, and we don't care. You have girlfriends for that.
Whatever happened to the word "handsome"/'beautiful"I'd be utterly stunned by a girl who greeted me with "Hey handsome!" instead of "Hey baby/stud/cutie/sexy" or whatever else you can think of.
On the other hand I'm not saying I wouldn't like it either.
Girls, I cannot stress this enough: if you aren't being treated right by a guy, don't wait for him to change!
Ditch his sorry butt, disgrace to the male population, and find someone who will treat you with utter respect. Someone who will honor your morals.
Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest.
Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes.
Someone who will love you, no matter how bad you make them feel.
Someone who will stop what they're doing just to look you in the eyes and say I love you and actually mean it.
Give the nice guys a chance.
Guys repost this if you agree.
Girls repost this if you think it's cute.
Every guy who isn't a jerk will agree with this, so we hope that all the girls that read this will repost this.
ADVICE:
*Holding Hands*
-Girls: If you want to hold his hand, gently bump into it a couple of times.
*Movies*
-Girls: During a movie, if he puts his arm around you, tilt your head on his shoulder.
-Guys: Lift her chin up and kiss her.
*Loving each other*
-Guys: When she tells you she loves you, look deep into her eyes, give her a peck on the lips, and tell her you love her too and mean it.
*Laying below the stars*
-Girls: When you're both laying under the stars, put your head on his chest and close your eyes as you listen to his steady heartbeat.
-Guys: Whisper in her ear and link your hands with hers.
By 12am tonight, your one true love will realize how much they want you if you forward this on.
Guys forward this if you agree, girls forward this if you think it's cute.
Girls, repost this as: Written by a guy ♥
Boys, repost this as: Girls need to realize ♥
what a healthy conversation
me: bakit kaya di ako magkaroon ng stable na relationship
tita: kasi di ka marunong magmahal! kaya ganyan
me: di paba ako marunong magmahal ng lagay na to..
tita: minsan akala natin alam na natin ang isang bagay pero matutuklasan mu sa huli na hindi pa pala.. magmahal ka di dahil sa gusto mong mag mahal kundi dahil iun ang tama... mahalin mu ang sarili mo... mahalin mo ang boung ikaw... subukan mong tangapin na hindi lahat ng gusto mo nkukuha mo.. subukan mong magbigay ng walang hinihinging kapalit.. pilitin mong wag manumbat... tangapin mo na masasaktan ka at di laging masaya..... pag nagawa mu yun matututo ka magmahal...
me: (turn around) may point ka.... (takbo ulit sa kwarto balik sa lamesa at power cry 5 mins)
tita: kasi di ka marunong magmahal! kaya ganyan
me: di paba ako marunong magmahal ng lagay na to..
tita: minsan akala natin alam na natin ang isang bagay pero matutuklasan mu sa huli na hindi pa pala.. magmahal ka di dahil sa gusto mong mag mahal kundi dahil iun ang tama... mahalin mu ang sarili mo... mahalin mo ang boung ikaw... subukan mong tangapin na hindi lahat ng gusto mo nkukuha mo.. subukan mong magbigay ng walang hinihinging kapalit.. pilitin mong wag manumbat... tangapin mo na masasaktan ka at di laging masaya..... pag nagawa mu yun matututo ka magmahal...
me: (turn around) may point ka.... (takbo ulit sa kwarto balik sa lamesa at power cry 5 mins)
Trust + Communication x Real Love = Strong and Longer Relationship
Relationships can be seen on different forms, different points of views and beliefs. As for me I see relationship as a sacred moment in which two lost souls find what they were looking for ,or not exactly it, but it’s the next step on finding the right person, right?? When I was young often dreamed of having a prince charming who would travel distance just to find me but unfortunately for me nothing really come knocking on my door. Well there were few but I never really felt the spark that “omg this is it I found Mr. prince-charming-who-would-travel-a-distance-to-find-me feeling!”
I was a never a big fan of long distance relationship until I found myself stuck with one. Before I remember telling my friends “long distance love never really exist it’s a big lie a big excuse of not accepting the fact that it will end soon” but then again I realized what am I missing? What was it that I haven’t seen? What was it that I haven’t been able to calculate? Ever wondered why our parents can last 5 to 6 years or more having along distance relationship?
It was October 12 this year when all this questions have been answered. I met a guy who turn my life upside down, who made me realize how worthy I am, who helped me cherish every moment and forget about tomorrow. That it was about me, him and us and his name is Nordie. Many things have been keeping us apart friends, issues and most of all distance! Yes DISTANCE is the biggest factor but it didn’t hinder us from making each other feel how special we are and how much we love each other.
By this I realize one thing, the thing that I haven’t seen, the thing that I had miscalculated, and the thing that makes this kind of relationship work. It’s non other than TRUST. Yes indeed in order to make a long distance relationship work is to keep the trust and to let go of the doubts. You see I once you started to trust your partner other things doesn’t really matter coz it would simply be in their right places.
Communication! It is very important to keep communication open as often as possible. You see with Nordie one thing I like about him is that sense of making you feel safe during conversation. You could tell him everything without any hesitations and fear. Every time he talks or say something you could feel the sincerity and the truthfulness on it.
Trust + Communication x Real Love = Strong and Longer Relationship! Distance doesn’t really matter, physical appearance doesn’t count. What matters is that you would like to make it work. I remember what my mom used to tell me “ once in a while you need to close your eyes listen to what your heart says, stop thinking about what others have say or what others have to think, coz at the end of the day it’s your happiness that is in stake”
To sum this all up I am thankful that once in my life there was a man who stand up beside me then brave enough to hold my hand and said “I will never let go, ill be here don’t know what tomorrow might bring what matter is that I cherish every moment and every day we have, and I love you” and this is what I have to say “I am thankful that in this crazy world of mine you came, and put me back on track. I was lost and you found me, I was down and you lifted me up. I was about to lose hope then you came and turn things to its rightful places. Mr. right came in different forms and for me you just came as perfect as what I imagined you to be. Thank you for making me feel loved and thank you for teaching me important values in life. I don’t care about what tomorrow brings what matter is we love each other and im willing to leap boundaries and take risks and stretch as often as I can….. and you’re a part of my life and will always be and by that I LOVE YOU WITH ALL OF MY HEART”
I am a believer….. I am in love ….. I am only yours……
I was a never a big fan of long distance relationship until I found myself stuck with one. Before I remember telling my friends “long distance love never really exist it’s a big lie a big excuse of not accepting the fact that it will end soon” but then again I realized what am I missing? What was it that I haven’t seen? What was it that I haven’t been able to calculate? Ever wondered why our parents can last 5 to 6 years or more having along distance relationship?
It was October 12 this year when all this questions have been answered. I met a guy who turn my life upside down, who made me realize how worthy I am, who helped me cherish every moment and forget about tomorrow. That it was about me, him and us and his name is Nordie. Many things have been keeping us apart friends, issues and most of all distance! Yes DISTANCE is the biggest factor but it didn’t hinder us from making each other feel how special we are and how much we love each other.
By this I realize one thing, the thing that I haven’t seen, the thing that I had miscalculated, and the thing that makes this kind of relationship work. It’s non other than TRUST. Yes indeed in order to make a long distance relationship work is to keep the trust and to let go of the doubts. You see I once you started to trust your partner other things doesn’t really matter coz it would simply be in their right places.
Communication! It is very important to keep communication open as often as possible. You see with Nordie one thing I like about him is that sense of making you feel safe during conversation. You could tell him everything without any hesitations and fear. Every time he talks or say something you could feel the sincerity and the truthfulness on it.
Trust + Communication x Real Love = Strong and Longer Relationship! Distance doesn’t really matter, physical appearance doesn’t count. What matters is that you would like to make it work. I remember what my mom used to tell me “ once in a while you need to close your eyes listen to what your heart says, stop thinking about what others have say or what others have to think, coz at the end of the day it’s your happiness that is in stake”
To sum this all up I am thankful that once in my life there was a man who stand up beside me then brave enough to hold my hand and said “I will never let go, ill be here don’t know what tomorrow might bring what matter is that I cherish every moment and every day we have, and I love you” and this is what I have to say “I am thankful that in this crazy world of mine you came, and put me back on track. I was lost and you found me, I was down and you lifted me up. I was about to lose hope then you came and turn things to its rightful places. Mr. right came in different forms and for me you just came as perfect as what I imagined you to be. Thank you for making me feel loved and thank you for teaching me important values in life. I don’t care about what tomorrow brings what matter is we love each other and im willing to leap boundaries and take risks and stretch as often as I can….. and you’re a part of my life and will always be and by that I LOVE YOU WITH ALL OF MY HEART”
I am a believer….. I am in love ….. I am only yours……
57 best thing in life
- Falling in love.
- Laughing so hard your face hurts.
- A hot shower.
- No lines at the super market.
- A special glance.
- Getting mail.
- Taking a drive on a pretty road.
- Hearing your favorite song on the radio.
- Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
- Hot towels out of the dryer.
- Finding the sweater you want is on sale for half price.
- Chocolate milkshake.
- A long distance phone call.
- A bubble bath.
- Giggling.
- A good conversation.
- The beach.
- Finding money in your coat from last winter.
- Laughing at yourself.
- Midnight phone calls that last for hours.
- Running through sprinklers.
- Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
- Having someone tell you that you’re beautiful.
- Laughing at an inside joke.
- Friends.
- Falling in love for the first time.
- Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
- Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
- Your first kiss.
- Making new friends or spending time with old ones.
- Playing with a new puppy.
- Late night talks with your roommate that keep you from sleeping.
- Having someone play with your hair.
- Sweet dreams.
- Hot chocolate.
- Road trips with friends.
- Swinging on swings.
- Watching a good movie cuddled up on a couch with someone you love.
- Wrapping presents under the Christmas tree while eating cookies and drinking eggnog.
- Song lyrics printed inside your new CD so you can sing along without feeling stupid.
- Going to a really good concert.
- Getting butterflies in your stomach every time you see that one person.
- Making eye contact with a cute stranger.
- Winning a really competitive game.
- Making chocolate chip cookies!
- Having your friends send you homemade cookies!
- Spending time with close friends!
- Seeing smiles and hearing laughter from your friends.
- Holding hands with someone you care about.
- Running into an old friend and realizing that some things (good or bad) never change.
- Discovering that love is unconditional and stronger than time.
- Riding the best roller coasters over and over.
- Hugging the person you love.
- Watching the expression someone’s face as they open a much-desired present from you.
- Watching the sunrise.
- Getting out of bed every morning and thanking God for another beautiful day.
- Having friends you know you can cry on or talk to about your deepest problems
Fresh Start or Stuck in the Past
Fresh Start or The Past
by Aidnace Walsh Clark on Sunday, November 14, 2010 at 3:56pm
Before I start let me thank those persons who helped me arrived in a certain decision. First and foremost my avid blog readers who keep on sending me messages asking me when am I going to write again, Next is my set of friends namely Stebie, Johnny, Baba and Aimee, those four person gave me such words which I need, to be at this point and my mom for the best words of wisdom that I would be including on the later part of my blog and of course my inspiration my sunshine, who became the cause of rainfall in my life… now lets start
How would you pick if you’re stuck in a decision between your past and a fresh start. We have certain qualifications and preferences but which is which?
First we have to take our feelings into consideration. According to Johnny, a friend of mine, “why should we go for the past if there is a new one? And past is past at the first place we’ll never be in love with a new one if we’re not yet over the past relationship we had”. Yes it was indeed true but as a defence mechanism of us human beings we tend to deny the fact that we are still in love with the past and try to cover it up using a new one.
Second we also have to take the feeling of the other person into consideration. yes you heard me right it is also appropriate to know whether that person whom you wanted to have a fresh start with is willing to be with you, what is the sense of staying with that said person if he doesn’t like you. Me myself had experienced it I was ready to leave my past behind and ready to start a new life but when I was about to start changing everything just fall apart I found myself alone and unhappy for the reason that, that person whom I wanted to have a fresh start with is gone. I felt devastated but can’t do anything coz the fact that he left me there means he doesn’t really liked me at all.
Third the reasons why we are pick who. Before picking someone we must have a reason. One mustn’t forgot about why he/she had chosen that person he had picked. Piece of advice, DO NOT OVER RATIONALIZE. Don’t use physical appearance (even though I know it counts a lot) during this stage as a reason on why you picked someone coz that show how immature are you and how shallow your feelings are. Don’t be deceived by sweet talks (curse you!!!) those things are dangerous they’ll hypnotize you made you believe in things then snatch your heart out of you.
Fourth love is indeed different from like. Go for the one whom you truly love not the one who fulfill your fantasies. Pick because you love that person not because you like him. This is common mistakes for us people we tend to pick those people we like over those people we love because we thought that they might have the things that we’ve been looking for or the things which the other one was lacking but finding out that you were wrong all along. And its too late to go back to what we’ve left the vision of fresh start was gone and the foundation of your past relationship has already been demolished and at the end you’ll be left all alone in the purgatory thinking about what you should’ve been done.
Lastly your capability to stand and fight of what you believe in or in what ever will make you happy. Even if you have those first four covered I believe that if you lack this last key everything is futile. Even if the feeling is mutual and the reasons are right and you’re indeed in love but you do not have enough courage to fight for each other everything you have will fall apart.
Love is but a matter of choice that should be accompanied with courage.Courage that would help you take that big leap to the otherside, courage that would help you fight for the one you love, courage to let go off the past and continue living without any chains attached and lastly courage to pursue and find happiness even though world has turned its back on you.
Do what you think will make you happy. decide not because you need to but because you wanted to. listen to what your heart says forget about them forget about people who keeps on telling you to pick this to pick that rather close your eyes listen to what your heart says then decide. believe me it works i've tried it about a million times :)
Plan to Win Back Your EX
To win back an ex, should not be made on impulse. It has to be well thought of and there should be an understanding, why you want to get back together.
Step 1: The recuperative period is crucial because if you do not recover long after your break-up or take too much time to break the mental block you have against your ex, you may just lose out on any chances of getting back together. It could be worse if he/she have got into another relationship. This will devastate you even more.
Step 2: When analyzing “what went wrong in your relationship?” don’t get emotional and make it worse on yourself by drinking or sobbing endlessly. You need to be truthful and find out what really did happen. Usually it could be you not meeting your ex’s needs or if you had some habit that was driving her/him away.
Step 3: The first thing you need to know when you are planning to fix the relationship is that you can only work with matters concerning yourself. Your ex is equally responsible but that is not in your hands. You have to ask yourself sincerely if you really want to change yourself, make sacrifices or compromise. Remember your ex knows you too well so you cannot ask for her empathy and then behave in the same old-fashioned way. The ex will only think of getting back if a noticeable change is discovered. If you are sure of yourself and convinced that splitting with your ex was the wrong decision only then go ahead.
Step 4: Once you have made up your mind, now there is no turning back. Always remember that the onus lies on you to re-ignite the relationship. Learn to frank and open, don’t beat around the bush. The first contact should be simple and general. Calling or chatting online is a good start to know how she/he is doing. It shows that you care about her well-being. After this first base, try spending some more time with her doing some activity that you both enjoy. With this you will be able to show her that you have changed. Let her/him notice this change rather than you pointing it out to her/him.
Step 5: Remain calm and see how he/she responds to you. Don’t force your ex to commit. The past doesn’t erase so easily. So give her time and see how the love blossoms again.
Step 1: The recuperative period is crucial because if you do not recover long after your break-up or take too much time to break the mental block you have against your ex, you may just lose out on any chances of getting back together. It could be worse if he/she have got into another relationship. This will devastate you even more.
Step 2: When analyzing “what went wrong in your relationship?” don’t get emotional and make it worse on yourself by drinking or sobbing endlessly. You need to be truthful and find out what really did happen. Usually it could be you not meeting your ex’s needs or if you had some habit that was driving her/him away.
Step 3: The first thing you need to know when you are planning to fix the relationship is that you can only work with matters concerning yourself. Your ex is equally responsible but that is not in your hands. You have to ask yourself sincerely if you really want to change yourself, make sacrifices or compromise. Remember your ex knows you too well so you cannot ask for her empathy and then behave in the same old-fashioned way. The ex will only think of getting back if a noticeable change is discovered. If you are sure of yourself and convinced that splitting with your ex was the wrong decision only then go ahead.
Step 4: Once you have made up your mind, now there is no turning back. Always remember that the onus lies on you to re-ignite the relationship. Learn to frank and open, don’t beat around the bush. The first contact should be simple and general. Calling or chatting online is a good start to know how she/he is doing. It shows that you care about her well-being. After this first base, try spending some more time with her doing some activity that you both enjoy. With this you will be able to show her that you have changed. Let her/him notice this change rather than you pointing it out to her/him.
Step 5: Remain calm and see how he/she responds to you. Don’t force your ex to commit. The past doesn’t erase so easily. So give her time and see how the love blossoms again.
Falling in Love Too Fast
The feeling of falling in love is of the most exciting, thrilling and life changing events. Falling in love can change your entire outlook on life. Falling in love can occupy your mind and seem to take away all of life's problems. However, falling in love can bring about a serious problem of endless heartaches if a person falls in love too fast. Let us look at what brings about the feeling of needing to fall in love, what defines true love and the string of broken hearts that can occur if one falls in love too quickly.
With these key elements examined, a person may realize that they are too rapidly generating the feeling of falling in love, and in doing so, producing unfortunate consequences. A life filled with a great amount of broken hearts predictably points to a great amount of relationships in which the person fell in love too quickly. Once acknowledged as a source of heartaches, one can achieve a more realistic approach to falling in love and finding someone special.
The majority of adult single people undoubtedly desire the ultimate feeling of being in love with another person. Instilled in people's minds is that love will bring happiness, safely and security. Most people are witness to a loving relationship from a very young age, as we witness the love of our parents. As adults, the media overwhelms us with love stories. Countless advertising bombards us to find love. When one is single, it may seem that everywhere they look; there are couples holding hands, talking and laughing together. This can produce an overpowering desire for a person to find love.
Real and genuine love means connecting in ways that are almost indescribable. Present are the key elements that each desire in a relationship. There is a strong emotional attachment, as well as an intense physical attraction. The two people in the relationship spent time thoroughly getting to know the each other. These people will understand each other quirks and habits. They will learn each others history and the life that they lived up until they met. After sometime, a feeling of comfort and admiration occurs. As cliche as it sounds, if love is going to happen, both will have a feeling of "fitting together" and "finding their better half". If both people involved in the relationship are content and their desires fulfilled, as time moves on, an increasing feeling of devotion and affection will change into a deep and strong feeling of love.
Without these fundamentals in place, having the feelings of falling in love exceedingly prematurely can result in needless heartbreaking outcomes. It is true that being single can sometimes produce intense feelings of loneliness. These feelings of solitude and wanting acceptance into a loving relationship can make one push for a relationship that is not correct for them. Beginning to spend time with another, sometimes a person will mistake the feeling of acceptance for the feeling of love. Love is not something easily obtained. For long periods, love can escape us, as we search for that someone special that we wish for in our lives.
Telling yourself that you are in love, does not create love. If not all of the essentials of genuine love are in place, convincing yourself that you are in love does not magically produce those necessary elements. If in almost every relationship you enter, you fall in love within a couple weeks or even days, you must ask yourself; are you really in love?
Undoubtedly, falling in love produces a magnificent euphoric high. The emotion of finding one's "soul mate" fulfills a deep desire to bond with someone. True love is such a rare find. In terms of realistic expectations, one simply cannot sincerely be in love with every person they meet or date. Allowing yourself to feel you are in love with almost everyone you connect with, in a small measure of time, only will lead to ultimate disappointment. Sincerely asking yourself the question, "Was it really true love?" may give you the knowledge that perhaps you did not actually experience love. This is not to imply you did not admire someone, like spending time with him or her or had lust for him or her. However, did real love exist? Comprehending that it did not, may lessen the sense of feeling betrayed and the feeling of being wounded from relationships gone astray.
To free yourself from being the victim of lost "love", give yourself the time to unequivocally get to know and appreciate someone, allowing love to happen in it's own due course. Do not impulsively rush into a state of feeling in love. Seriously consider all of the factors that ensure a real and lasting love. Give this feeling time to develop. Only then, can you truly know that you are in love.
With these key elements examined, a person may realize that they are too rapidly generating the feeling of falling in love, and in doing so, producing unfortunate consequences. A life filled with a great amount of broken hearts predictably points to a great amount of relationships in which the person fell in love too quickly. Once acknowledged as a source of heartaches, one can achieve a more realistic approach to falling in love and finding someone special.
The majority of adult single people undoubtedly desire the ultimate feeling of being in love with another person. Instilled in people's minds is that love will bring happiness, safely and security. Most people are witness to a loving relationship from a very young age, as we witness the love of our parents. As adults, the media overwhelms us with love stories. Countless advertising bombards us to find love. When one is single, it may seem that everywhere they look; there are couples holding hands, talking and laughing together. This can produce an overpowering desire for a person to find love.
Real and genuine love means connecting in ways that are almost indescribable. Present are the key elements that each desire in a relationship. There is a strong emotional attachment, as well as an intense physical attraction. The two people in the relationship spent time thoroughly getting to know the each other. These people will understand each other quirks and habits. They will learn each others history and the life that they lived up until they met. After sometime, a feeling of comfort and admiration occurs. As cliche as it sounds, if love is going to happen, both will have a feeling of "fitting together" and "finding their better half". If both people involved in the relationship are content and their desires fulfilled, as time moves on, an increasing feeling of devotion and affection will change into a deep and strong feeling of love.
Without these fundamentals in place, having the feelings of falling in love exceedingly prematurely can result in needless heartbreaking outcomes. It is true that being single can sometimes produce intense feelings of loneliness. These feelings of solitude and wanting acceptance into a loving relationship can make one push for a relationship that is not correct for them. Beginning to spend time with another, sometimes a person will mistake the feeling of acceptance for the feeling of love. Love is not something easily obtained. For long periods, love can escape us, as we search for that someone special that we wish for in our lives.
Telling yourself that you are in love, does not create love. If not all of the essentials of genuine love are in place, convincing yourself that you are in love does not magically produce those necessary elements. If in almost every relationship you enter, you fall in love within a couple weeks or even days, you must ask yourself; are you really in love?
Undoubtedly, falling in love produces a magnificent euphoric high. The emotion of finding one's "soul mate" fulfills a deep desire to bond with someone. True love is such a rare find. In terms of realistic expectations, one simply cannot sincerely be in love with every person they meet or date. Allowing yourself to feel you are in love with almost everyone you connect with, in a small measure of time, only will lead to ultimate disappointment. Sincerely asking yourself the question, "Was it really true love?" may give you the knowledge that perhaps you did not actually experience love. This is not to imply you did not admire someone, like spending time with him or her or had lust for him or her. However, did real love exist? Comprehending that it did not, may lessen the sense of feeling betrayed and the feeling of being wounded from relationships gone astray.
To free yourself from being the victim of lost "love", give yourself the time to unequivocally get to know and appreciate someone, allowing love to happen in it's own due course. Do not impulsively rush into a state of feeling in love. Seriously consider all of the factors that ensure a real and lasting love. Give this feeling time to develop. Only then, can you truly know that you are in love.
When is the right time to stop loving??
Hay eto nana man ako inspired gumawa ng blog bago ko simulan blog ko let me thanks certain people 1st si “BORABABY” siya kasi inspiration ko sa pagsulat nito if he didn’t open up di ko makakaisip ng topic. 2nd si karla na panay panay binabasa blog ko thanks naapriciate kita. 3rd si dico Louie na nagbigay sakin ng isang eye opener na clincher ehehe. Lastly si mommy ko at ang kanyang words of wisdom. Now lets begin.
What might be the cause why you must stop loving someone??? That was the question ask by my fellow student when I was reading my messages this morning. Then I remember my friend Mackie (he is actually borababy I mention him earlier) he’s from Cebu he’s a really nice guy, he’s friendly but the problem is he is committed to someone who is miles away from him with no other communication but the internet. But despite of this kind of relationship he remained honest, loyal and trustworthy.
They’ve been together for a long time now but he revealed that his partner was not making that much effort as he is. That he is often times taken for granted. That his partner is engaged on other relationships in addition to this he barely felt the love that he was looking for. Sadly Mackie remained to be their for his partner. Hoping that one day that person would wake up someday realizing his worth.
Yesterday when I was chatting Mackie confessed that he is getting tired of the same scenario which happens over and over. Furthermore, he also told me that he’s been crying almost every night for the same reason and he’s about to breakdown any moment and the worst part is he is falling out of love.
I advised him to still hold on to his partner a little bit longer and try to fix their relationship until it’s not to late. But the truth is at the back of my mind I really wanted to tell him to stop and sit down and rest. Put his gun down and stop the fight. Coz a person like him doesn’t deserve to be taken for granted.
Then this morning he told me that he finally broke up with his partner not because he want to but because it’s the right thing to do. The hardest part of being loved by someone is the uncertainty that it may stop anytime and sadly for his partner it ends today. You really have to be tired to realize love can end especially if it wasn’t meant to be
Train yourself to let go of the things you fear to lose, so that when that something is gone you wont feel shitty, damn hurting and worthless. One thing I’ve learned from Nico Miguel is that never let the someone be your everything while he makes you feel like your nothing. Lower all your defenses fall if you have to fall because I know someday you’ll recover.
Take out all your expectations as my mom told me before “EXPECTATIONS are the ones who’s responsible for all the PAIN that you’re acquiring”. In short don’t be stupid holding on to somebody who is obviously fooling you. Remember: “wala pang medalya para sa tanga”. Your world doesn’t only revolve on him. If you would only try to look around you a lot of people are willing to make you happy. Don’t let your heart to be numb, be sensitive. Even insects get tired, even Spiderman had surrender and even Superman does get weak at times.
Sometimes I know its hard to be hurt but still you have to try coz to be hurt is a part of being complete. Things happen coz we choose to, there maybe regret but blaming is not an option. We are where we are coz we brought ourselves there. In our life we are given certain choices, have to make certain decisions that may change our life we get happy, we get sad but most importantly we learn. Every beginning has to end and Every story that ends will open a way for new stories to start. Who knows the next story might be the best love story written for you by God.
Happiness begins at the point of acceptance: the point when we stop questioning why life can’t be that perfect……..
What might be the cause why you must stop loving someone??? That was the question ask by my fellow student when I was reading my messages this morning. Then I remember my friend Mackie (he is actually borababy I mention him earlier) he’s from Cebu he’s a really nice guy, he’s friendly but the problem is he is committed to someone who is miles away from him with no other communication but the internet. But despite of this kind of relationship he remained honest, loyal and trustworthy.
They’ve been together for a long time now but he revealed that his partner was not making that much effort as he is. That he is often times taken for granted. That his partner is engaged on other relationships in addition to this he barely felt the love that he was looking for. Sadly Mackie remained to be their for his partner. Hoping that one day that person would wake up someday realizing his worth.
Yesterday when I was chatting Mackie confessed that he is getting tired of the same scenario which happens over and over. Furthermore, he also told me that he’s been crying almost every night for the same reason and he’s about to breakdown any moment and the worst part is he is falling out of love.
I advised him to still hold on to his partner a little bit longer and try to fix their relationship until it’s not to late. But the truth is at the back of my mind I really wanted to tell him to stop and sit down and rest. Put his gun down and stop the fight. Coz a person like him doesn’t deserve to be taken for granted.
Then this morning he told me that he finally broke up with his partner not because he want to but because it’s the right thing to do. The hardest part of being loved by someone is the uncertainty that it may stop anytime and sadly for his partner it ends today. You really have to be tired to realize love can end especially if it wasn’t meant to be
Train yourself to let go of the things you fear to lose, so that when that something is gone you wont feel shitty, damn hurting and worthless. One thing I’ve learned from Nico Miguel is that never let the someone be your everything while he makes you feel like your nothing. Lower all your defenses fall if you have to fall because I know someday you’ll recover.
Take out all your expectations as my mom told me before “EXPECTATIONS are the ones who’s responsible for all the PAIN that you’re acquiring”. In short don’t be stupid holding on to somebody who is obviously fooling you. Remember: “wala pang medalya para sa tanga”. Your world doesn’t only revolve on him. If you would only try to look around you a lot of people are willing to make you happy. Don’t let your heart to be numb, be sensitive. Even insects get tired, even Spiderman had surrender and even Superman does get weak at times.
Sometimes I know its hard to be hurt but still you have to try coz to be hurt is a part of being complete. Things happen coz we choose to, there maybe regret but blaming is not an option. We are where we are coz we brought ourselves there. In our life we are given certain choices, have to make certain decisions that may change our life we get happy, we get sad but most importantly we learn. Every beginning has to end and Every story that ends will open a way for new stories to start. Who knows the next story might be the best love story written for you by God.
Happiness begins at the point of acceptance: the point when we stop questioning why life can’t be that perfect……..
Moving on.....
Moving on.....
by Aidnace Walsh Clark on Sunday, June 6, 2010 at 1:10am
Losing love can be painful for anyone. But if it's your first real love and the relationship ends before you want it to, feelings of loss can seem overwhelming. Like the feelings of passion early in the relationship, the newness and rawness of grief and loss can be intense — and devastating. There's a reason why they call it a broken heart.
When a relationship ends, people really need support. Losing a first love isn't something we've been emotionally prepared to cope with. It can help to have close friends and family members to lean on. Unfortunately, lots of people — often adults — expect younger people to bounce back and "just get over it." If your heart is broken, find someone you can talk to who really understands the pain you're going through.
It seems hard to believe when you're brokenhearted that you can ever feel better. But gradually these feelings grow less intense. Eventually, people move on to other relationships and experiences.
Relationships — whether they last 2 weeks, 2 months, 2 years, or a lifetime — are all opportunities to experience love on its many different levels. We learn both how to love and how to be loved in return.
Romance provides us with a chance to discover our own selves as we share with someone new. We learn the things we love about ourselves, the things we'd like to change, and the qualities and values we look for in a partner.
Loving relationships teach us self-respect as well as respect for others. Love is one of the most fulfilling things we can have in our lives. If romance hasn't found you yet, don't worry — there's plenty of time. And the right person is worth the wait.
When a relationship ends, people really need support. Losing a first love isn't something we've been emotionally prepared to cope with. It can help to have close friends and family members to lean on. Unfortunately, lots of people — often adults — expect younger people to bounce back and "just get over it." If your heart is broken, find someone you can talk to who really understands the pain you're going through.
It seems hard to believe when you're brokenhearted that you can ever feel better. But gradually these feelings grow less intense. Eventually, people move on to other relationships and experiences.
Relationships — whether they last 2 weeks, 2 months, 2 years, or a lifetime — are all opportunities to experience love on its many different levels. We learn both how to love and how to be loved in return.
Romance provides us with a chance to discover our own selves as we share with someone new. We learn the things we love about ourselves, the things we'd like to change, and the qualities and values we look for in a partner.
Loving relationships teach us self-respect as well as respect for others. Love is one of the most fulfilling things we can have in our lives. If romance hasn't found you yet, don't worry — there's plenty of time. And the right person is worth the wait.
Accepting a Painful Breakup
accepting a break up (i wrote this several months ago i guess you needed this)
by Aidnace Walsh Clark on Sunday, June 6, 2010 at 12:58am
Destruction of a life, career, a mind and a bright shining flower withers away. That is what break-ups do most of the times. The trauma of a break-up becomes impossible to bear for many and they suffer over a very long period. They are bewildered with what happened. They simply cannot believe it. They are stunned and that feeling of disbelief and the knock of the break-up hurts so badly that some lose their mental stability.
Let us not go into why the break-ups occur. But if a person suffers so much after a break-up as we described above then obviously he/she was cheated by the partner into the belief that he/she was a ideal person deserving all the love and devotion. But the reality was different. That person was dishonest, without integrity and deserved no love from a honest person. That person was cruel and mean-minded and came in to a life only to destroy it forever.
What can be done by the suffering party? As we said the shock is very big at times and the person cannot believe that he/she did it. For him/her the ex-partner was the best human being going around. An example of truth, honesty, integrity and love. So the first thing to accept and realize is that you were cheated by someone who was deceptive. You were wrong in your thinking that the other person was honest and trust worthy. You were fooled. This will be very difficult to do, but has to be done. No amount of grief will help unless you first accept that - You were a fool. You gave your love and devotion to a person who was totally undeserving. You could not understand it. You failed.
After the break-up, it is not only the shock of having been dumped, but also the loss of love that hurts badly. You loved that person with all your might. You took care to see that you gave every comfort and total trust to that person. You might have even sacrificed many precious relationships and career in your love. And the memories of time shared together. That lingers. They hurt. Everything hurts.
First please accept that you were fooled by someone who was a cheat. Repeat it in your mind as many times as you can. Whenever you feel like grieving, do it. When the memories of earlier shared moments come to haunt you, relive them, but at the end repeat that- You were fooled by someone totally untrustworthy. Accept that fact and your recovery may become a real possibility after a bad break-up.
(i wrote this several months ago i guess you needed this)
Let us not go into why the break-ups occur. But if a person suffers so much after a break-up as we described above then obviously he/she was cheated by the partner into the belief that he/she was a ideal person deserving all the love and devotion. But the reality was different. That person was dishonest, without integrity and deserved no love from a honest person. That person was cruel and mean-minded and came in to a life only to destroy it forever.
What can be done by the suffering party? As we said the shock is very big at times and the person cannot believe that he/she did it. For him/her the ex-partner was the best human being going around. An example of truth, honesty, integrity and love. So the first thing to accept and realize is that you were cheated by someone who was deceptive. You were wrong in your thinking that the other person was honest and trust worthy. You were fooled. This will be very difficult to do, but has to be done. No amount of grief will help unless you first accept that - You were a fool. You gave your love and devotion to a person who was totally undeserving. You could not understand it. You failed.
After the break-up, it is not only the shock of having been dumped, but also the loss of love that hurts badly. You loved that person with all your might. You took care to see that you gave every comfort and total trust to that person. You might have even sacrificed many precious relationships and career in your love. And the memories of time shared together. That lingers. They hurt. Everything hurts.
First please accept that you were fooled by someone who was a cheat. Repeat it in your mind as many times as you can. Whenever you feel like grieving, do it. When the memories of earlier shared moments come to haunt you, relive them, but at the end repeat that- You were fooled by someone totally untrustworthy. Accept that fact and your recovery may become a real possibility after a bad break-up.
(i wrote this several months ago i guess you needed this)
little miss sunshine turns gloomy
its been 21 years of fighting and keeping my walls standing still... but i guess my strength is not enough to keep my stand.... I'm one of those people who try so hard to thinks that they're strong enough that we never needed anyone to be there for us but the next thing i knew is that I'm already falling from that hill.. i remember what my friend Melissa told me before "even little miss sunshine needs to be gloomy sometimes!!".Lowering such defenses is a big risk you might lose control of your life but how long would you keep on running, keep on turning away from everything instead of facing it and take all the bullet we might not able to survive but what matters most is that before we fall and fail we were strong enough to face reality. love just isn't safe... i'm not safe but that's okay at least I've been happy..i know how hard it is to hang on a thread my walls are breaking, its too close its more than i can take i'm just tired of running and hiding.. how hard it is when everything keeps on hindering you from your happiness all you can do is just wait for that moment that perfect moment to escape and grab on.... and by then you might be able to escape and have what you want........ tkae it from me... coz i wasn't able to escape and now i'm still trying to have ny 2nd attempt.... and i wish i could....
Funny Isn't it??
It’s funny how hello is always accompied with goodbye. It’s funny how good memories can start to make you cry. It’s funny how forever never seems to really last. It’s funny how much you’d lose if you forgot about your past. It’s funny how friends can leave you when you’re down. It’s funny how when you need someone, they’re never around. It’s funny how people change and think they’re so much better. It’s funny how many lies can be packed in one ‘love letter’. It’s funny how people can forgive, even though they can’t forget. It’s funny how one night can contain so much regret. It’s funny how ironic life turns out to be. But, the funniest part of all is that none of this really seems funny to me.
-another inpirational thing i've thought salamat fergie!
-another inpirational thing i've thought salamat fergie!
A SPECIAL MESSAGE from :Fergie Fabian
If pain must come, may it come quickly. Because I have a life to live, and I need to live it the best way possible. If you have to make a choice, may you make it now. Then I will either wait for you or forget you. Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worst kind of suffering.
—sinabi ni Paulo Coelho sa By The River Piedra I Sat Down And Wept. Pinost ko para sa kaibigan kong si Aidnace. Break her heart and I’ll break your bones. :)
A POST FROM MY SISTER FERGIE!!!! THANKS FERG ILOVE YOU
—sinabi ni Paulo Coelho sa By The River Piedra I Sat Down And Wept. Pinost ko para sa kaibigan kong si Aidnace. Break her heart and I’ll break your bones. :)
A POST FROM MY SISTER FERGIE!!!! THANKS FERG ILOVE YOU
a happy ever after in this almost fairy tale story....
I’ve been in this particular situation a thousand times before. The feeling was quite different like it was used to be. I’ve been trying so hard to understand why but it seemed so hard to do so. I’m standing here where everything started where everything he is become a part of me. I’m here not to reminisce but to see if going back to the place where everything changed and became a part of my system would make me realize certain things.
2 weeks have passed since I was officially single and had my share of sadness but, moreover, I had been blessed of great happiness. I maybe alone now but I would not be forever.
Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone, your life waiting for a call to prove that you’re not alone? Sad isn’t it, the agony of waiting, the fear of rejection the pain caused by frustration. But once that phone rings everything seems to fade away.
I love to think how Alice can escape reality by going to Wonderland. How Snow White can be so stubborn yet still have seven dwarves to be there for her and support her. How Sleeping Beauty chose to sleep rather than to feel the pain of being alone.
Sometimes I just wished that I have Little Red Riding Hood’s courage to face what lies ahead with all her heart and letting herself be in control. I wished I had Ariel’s faith, faith that even though how painful things could be love would melt them away. I wished I had Mr. Carl Fredricksen’s patience to wait for the right time and right moment to fly and to follow what his heart says.
But unfortunately I’m just me, nobody cares but me……..
And as I stand still to feel how different it is now than before I smiled and turned away…
Yes I realized one thing. Junie made me a better person by breaking my heart and by leaving me empty handed and for that I thank you! While leaving that place I see certain faces. Faces that had lifted me when I was down, faces who are still struggling to win back the love that they had lost, faces that made inspired me and most of all a face a certain face that all along I was inlove with
2 weeks have passed since I was officially single and had my share of sadness but, moreover, I had been blessed of great happiness. I maybe alone now but I would not be forever.
Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone, your life waiting for a call to prove that you’re not alone? Sad isn’t it, the agony of waiting, the fear of rejection the pain caused by frustration. But once that phone rings everything seems to fade away.
I love to think how Alice can escape reality by going to Wonderland. How Snow White can be so stubborn yet still have seven dwarves to be there for her and support her. How Sleeping Beauty chose to sleep rather than to feel the pain of being alone.
Sometimes I just wished that I have Little Red Riding Hood’s courage to face what lies ahead with all her heart and letting herself be in control. I wished I had Ariel’s faith, faith that even though how painful things could be love would melt them away. I wished I had Mr. Carl Fredricksen’s patience to wait for the right time and right moment to fly and to follow what his heart says.
But unfortunately I’m just me, nobody cares but me……..
And as I stand still to feel how different it is now than before I smiled and turned away…
Yes I realized one thing. Junie made me a better person by breaking my heart and by leaving me empty handed and for that I thank you! While leaving that place I see certain faces. Faces that had lifted me when I was down, faces who are still struggling to win back the love that they had lost, faces that made inspired me and most of all a face a certain face that all along I was inlove with
A Bittersweet Ending
looking back to what had happen,makes me wonder what was the real reason why things needed to end in a bitter-sweet way. it was 2:13 am Friday while i was waiting for Jaycee's (a new guy i met and currently having a good time with) text if he already arrived home. i decided to go out a look at the sky then i notice how amazing stars are and it hit me maybe i wasn't like those big stars who shine so brightly, noticeable, beautiful and precious maybe i was just one of those types who tried to shine but never really been able to make it through the thick clouds.
i was glad that he's happy(talking about my x bf) the only thing that pains me is the reality that we had almost been there... almost conquer everything.... several months of fighting and keeping it alive has gone to waste.i am writing this down not get him back but to let people know that i had endured enough pain yet been able to stay strong and to stand up again and make it.
this last month was a hell for me several things happened. i was denied by PRC,my mom has to go back to states while my dad has lost his job and my brothers are leaving soon to have their jobs in manila, i had to go back home and leave my apartment the only escaped i had and lastly the devastating break up i had.
i was hurt honestly i even tried to kill myself but not because i was heart broken... but because I AM TIRED.... Tired of facing the cruelty of life. i am trying to move forward now thanks to my friends. but i will never forget how things changed my life. he taught me how to be strong and to face the world alone.
this time i am fighting not for love but for my survival... lost a big part of me this last few months.i had change a lot. now i am venturing in a new chapter of my life. and as i know it once i step forward there will be no coming back. i'm standing still and waiting for the right moment to take that big step whether backward or forward its all up to me.
right now as i stand and raise my hands above the air and feel the wind and letting my tears flow i had find myself happy and i feel so free. yes it is still painful. yes i still love him but i have to give myself a little pride and accept the fact that no amount of hope can bring him back.
and as go back inside my room and heard my phone ringing and saw Jaycee's name on the screen my tears just rolled and i found myself saying "i know i wasn't the one for him (my x) maybe this time it will be sweeter". and it reminded me of the first time Jaycee looked at me and smiled from that moment my heart never stop beating for him and that made me realize one thing........ I AM SPECIAL :)
P.S
PLEASE DO NOT TELL ME TO MOVE ON CAUSE I AM MOVING ON
PLEASE DON'T TRY TO TELL ME TO BE STRONG CAUSE I AM TRYING TO
PLEASE DON'T ASK ME IF IM OK CAUSE I AM NOT :)
i was glad that he's happy(talking about my x bf) the only thing that pains me is the reality that we had almost been there... almost conquer everything.... several months of fighting and keeping it alive has gone to waste.i am writing this down not get him back but to let people know that i had endured enough pain yet been able to stay strong and to stand up again and make it.
this last month was a hell for me several things happened. i was denied by PRC,my mom has to go back to states while my dad has lost his job and my brothers are leaving soon to have their jobs in manila, i had to go back home and leave my apartment the only escaped i had and lastly the devastating break up i had.
i was hurt honestly i even tried to kill myself but not because i was heart broken... but because I AM TIRED.... Tired of facing the cruelty of life. i am trying to move forward now thanks to my friends. but i will never forget how things changed my life. he taught me how to be strong and to face the world alone.
this time i am fighting not for love but for my survival... lost a big part of me this last few months.i had change a lot. now i am venturing in a new chapter of my life. and as i know it once i step forward there will be no coming back. i'm standing still and waiting for the right moment to take that big step whether backward or forward its all up to me.
right now as i stand and raise my hands above the air and feel the wind and letting my tears flow i had find myself happy and i feel so free. yes it is still painful. yes i still love him but i have to give myself a little pride and accept the fact that no amount of hope can bring him back.
and as go back inside my room and heard my phone ringing and saw Jaycee's name on the screen my tears just rolled and i found myself saying "i know i wasn't the one for him (my x) maybe this time it will be sweeter". and it reminded me of the first time Jaycee looked at me and smiled from that moment my heart never stop beating for him and that made me realize one thing........ I AM SPECIAL :)
P.S
PLEASE DO NOT TELL ME TO MOVE ON CAUSE I AM MOVING ON
PLEASE DON'T TRY TO TELL ME TO BE STRONG CAUSE I AM TRYING TO
PLEASE DON'T ASK ME IF IM OK CAUSE I AM NOT :)
Falling inlove -is it worth it??-
Sometimes in the past, late at night, when it's too quiet to pretend, I worry if I believe in anything at all or at least in anything beautiful. I believed in change because it is permanent. I believed in pain because it is sometimes physical. I believe in anger because it can consume you. But I was not sure I can believe in either love or trust. I could not then understand these two things most people build their dreams on.
Love fails to be unconditional by that one condition itself. It ends when we fall out of it. Then, we claim it never was love because love shouldn't die. It is forever. But when it becomes a routine (like saying "I love you" for instance), love does die. Lastly, when love turns selfish, confusing and burdensome, it isn't beautiful anymore.
As for trust, it was self-explanatory until I doubted it. When curiosity gives way to suspicion, betrayal isn't far behind. For every failed judgment we ask ourselves: "Did I trust too little or too much?". It is difficult to shut up every question in favor of complete trust, only to realize too late something you could have known had you only asked. Where does love and trust start and end?
I have seen hundreds of people disappointed over un-fulfilling relationships. I have seen passion turn into poison. I have grieved with them for the love they lost or never found. We seem to love so much, but now it's gone. We ask ourselves: "Why do I feel so lonely even if he's right beside me? Why can't our relationship be more than this?".
I think all people have at one point in their life experienced the painful realization of a love unrequited. Even with all
the discouragement, even with all the well-intentioned advice from friends, falling in love is a no-going-back event. Unfortunately, time can't be reversed.
Now, falling in love in itself is doubted by people around you. They cannot feel the warmth that consumes you. They cannot ache with the turbulent and confusing anxiety and joy that grips you. They do not know that mental stress you experience trying to rationalize your emotions. They cannot believe that you do not want to be in love with a person who doesn't love you back. Oftentimes, people in love are painted as puppies following their loved ones at a distance and enjoying it. Oftentimes, people in love are misunderstood.
Who can enjoy running around with your heart on your sleeve? It's like trying to cross a tightrope and always falling into jagged cliffs because you are nervous, oh so nervous! Loving and loving without getting any response can be destructive to anyone. It is a thousand deaths every time. It's an "unmourned" for death because no one else can understand.
Love is not sustained by hope but by wishes. There's a difference. No matter how perverse, people suffering from unrequited love try to get out of it while secretly wishing that she'd give a sign to show it isn't hopeless. In desperation, unrequited lovers can even imagine signs if only to remain sane.
How can you love a brick wall? A dead end? A slavery without any sign of salvation? How foolish! How unreasonable! Unfortunately, how human too!
"Why won't he love me? What is wrong with me?", scattered thoughts echoing such pain are not exactly abnormal. Even the best-looking, best-hearted people can't always expect others to love them back. Why? People sometimes need to feel unloved by everyone so that they learn to love themselves.
There is nothing wrong with unrequited love. It happens all the time. I won't delude you into thinking that if he can't love you back he is not worth it. In fact, believe that he is. he is worth it all: the headaches, the anxiety, the embarrassment, etc. he is worth it because, like you, he needs others loving him. This sounds funny but the world is round for a reason. We are all part of a circle. If you love him and he loves someone else, just think of whom you're hurting by loving him. It's a cycle. Whose love are you not returning?
I know we can love deeply, tenderly and lastingly. I have seen such love and I have felt such love myself. I learned that, aside from love and trust, a fulfilling relationship begins when two people make their time together their number one priority. If we hope to find love, we must first
find time for loving. Many couples experienced a tragic moment together that taught them to value their time together. How we see our partners often depends on how we are than how they are. We are not audience but participant observers in each others lives.
I used to ask myself where the love between my ex-boyfriend and I had gone. Maybe it's because we forgot that we are the ones who make it. Love was not out there. It was here between my ex and me. Before, I was his as a very sweet, caring, patient, and loyal person. But now it's different. It seemed like I'm the only one who does the loving. he really changed a lot. People really do change. Our hurtful and infantile arguments illustrate how we, instead of looking for love, may look for flaws. We spent the relationship struggling to change others minds. But I realized it a little too late.
We must accept that there are many realities and learn to accept different points of view. My ex then became my eye-opener. he saw what I never could, and do the same for him. We made points of view between the two of us that's totally different from either one of us. he was there with me when it can be too cold or too warm. Both of us were restless, yearning for more than what we had, what we were. Everything was unbalanced and unpredictable. In almost imperfect setting, two not-so-perfect people shared something so very simple---a perfectly imperfect friendship---it's enough. At least he gave me something beautiful to believe in (love and trust).
I have felt so much pain during the relationship with my ex. It was hard to accept that I have loved someone who stopped loving me. Now, I couldn't help ask myself why do I no longer believe those two beautiful ideas (love and trust). Why can't I give myself a chance to be in love again? Maybe I'm just too scared. Or perhaps, maybe because I had been waiting for a perfect moment, a perfect someone, and a perfect me. maybe because I had always felt that beliefs ought to be perfect---ideal, so to speak ugh!
At the end of the day, when all is said and done, loving without being loved back is the best thing to do because feeling so much pain, I learn to heal; knowing so much fear, I learn to stand up to anything, carrying so much sadness, I learn to glorify in joy.
Love is not destroyed by a single failure or won by a single caress. It is a lifetime venture in which we're always learning, discovering and growing.
Lastly, this may be a cliche but there is someone who is right for you (and even for me), and even if he's not, he'd still be right because loving doesn't make sense until you accept it and make it real.
Love: "IF YOU LOSE LOVE, THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT YOU HAVE FAILED IN LOVE. CRY IF YOU HAVE TO, BUT MAKE SURE THAT TEAR WASHES AWAY THE HURT AND THE BITTERNESS THAT THE PAST LEFT YOU WITH. LET GO OF YESTERDAY AND LOVE WILL FIND ITS BACK TO YOU". And when it does, pray that it may be the love that will stay and last a lifetime.
A woman on the rebound could easily fall for sweeping emotions and be made to falsely believe that she finally stumbled upon the right man when what she just found is only someone to cover up for the love she lost . A man who makes promises with words and not with actions may never live up to fulfill them. "IT'S TRUE THAT LOVE CAN WAIT FOREVER BUT IT IS CRAZY TO STUBBORNLY HOPE FOR SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T EVEN CARE OR UNDERSTAND HOW WE FEEL".
"DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME WAITING FOR SOMEONE WHO NEVER REALLY CARED ABOUT HOW YOU WOULD HAVE FELT. OPEN YOUR HEART AGAIN AND GIVE YOURSELF THE CHANCE TO FIND THE MAN WHO WOULD MAKE LOVING WORTH THE PAIN AND THE SACRIFICE." Just like anything else, our love grows weak and extent. Beyond that, it withers without any hope of recovery and soon dies.
God wakes us up in the midst of a storm to teach us a lesson. He takes away people we love, so we can learn to value love itself. He makes us cry so hard so we can see clearly when we open our eyes. He makes us bitter so we can realize that there is no genuine happiness if we think only of our needs and not of others.
Relationships built on jealousy and selfishness is doomed from the very beginning. The hardest part of losing love is letting go and moving on. Most of us cry endlessly over things that could have been but never will be.
"God allows us to experience pain to make us stronger and better persons. He will see us through the most trying and difficult times in our lives and only if we put our trust in Him we can learn to find joy in our tears and happiness in our sorrows".
THERE IS NO FUTURE IN A RELATIONSHIP OF LIES AND SELFISHNESS. It's true, there's life in love . But, there can still be life even after losing love if you leave the past behind and let your heart heal and give you the chance to find yourself again. The success of a relationship lies not only in the beauty of its beginning but in its consistency. Make a choice not on impulse but a decision based on a healthy balance of mind and heart. Let us always remember that "HAPPINESS IS NOT A MATTER OF DESTINY BUT A MATTER OF CHOICE".
"Letting go is a decision that can never be dictated on us. It is a resolve we make ourselves. Acceptance is the key to a
new beginning and time is the healer of all wounds.
"There is nothing wrong in expressing our feelings to someone we love, but "we must always be sensitive to the signals that tell us when to rationalize and be sensible." There comes a time in our lives when we would fall for someone who wouldn't be as interested as we are because his attention is focused on someone else.
Even if the storm casts its fearful shadow, there will always be light after our darkness and lonely moments. There is always a hope for those who believe. There is always a chance for those who try. "Losing someone we may not be a loss at all but a blessing because someone even more is yet to come".
Love fails to be unconditional by that one condition itself. It ends when we fall out of it. Then, we claim it never was love because love shouldn't die. It is forever. But when it becomes a routine (like saying "I love you" for instance), love does die. Lastly, when love turns selfish, confusing and burdensome, it isn't beautiful anymore.
As for trust, it was self-explanatory until I doubted it. When curiosity gives way to suspicion, betrayal isn't far behind. For every failed judgment we ask ourselves: "Did I trust too little or too much?". It is difficult to shut up every question in favor of complete trust, only to realize too late something you could have known had you only asked. Where does love and trust start and end?
I have seen hundreds of people disappointed over un-fulfilling relationships. I have seen passion turn into poison. I have grieved with them for the love they lost or never found. We seem to love so much, but now it's gone. We ask ourselves: "Why do I feel so lonely even if he's right beside me? Why can't our relationship be more than this?".
I think all people have at one point in their life experienced the painful realization of a love unrequited. Even with all
the discouragement, even with all the well-intentioned advice from friends, falling in love is a no-going-back event. Unfortunately, time can't be reversed.
Now, falling in love in itself is doubted by people around you. They cannot feel the warmth that consumes you. They cannot ache with the turbulent and confusing anxiety and joy that grips you. They do not know that mental stress you experience trying to rationalize your emotions. They cannot believe that you do not want to be in love with a person who doesn't love you back. Oftentimes, people in love are painted as puppies following their loved ones at a distance and enjoying it. Oftentimes, people in love are misunderstood.
Who can enjoy running around with your heart on your sleeve? It's like trying to cross a tightrope and always falling into jagged cliffs because you are nervous, oh so nervous! Loving and loving without getting any response can be destructive to anyone. It is a thousand deaths every time. It's an "unmourned" for death because no one else can understand.
Love is not sustained by hope but by wishes. There's a difference. No matter how perverse, people suffering from unrequited love try to get out of it while secretly wishing that she'd give a sign to show it isn't hopeless. In desperation, unrequited lovers can even imagine signs if only to remain sane.
How can you love a brick wall? A dead end? A slavery without any sign of salvation? How foolish! How unreasonable! Unfortunately, how human too!
"Why won't he love me? What is wrong with me?", scattered thoughts echoing such pain are not exactly abnormal. Even the best-looking, best-hearted people can't always expect others to love them back. Why? People sometimes need to feel unloved by everyone so that they learn to love themselves.
There is nothing wrong with unrequited love. It happens all the time. I won't delude you into thinking that if he can't love you back he is not worth it. In fact, believe that he is. he is worth it all: the headaches, the anxiety, the embarrassment, etc. he is worth it because, like you, he needs others loving him. This sounds funny but the world is round for a reason. We are all part of a circle. If you love him and he loves someone else, just think of whom you're hurting by loving him. It's a cycle. Whose love are you not returning?
I know we can love deeply, tenderly and lastingly. I have seen such love and I have felt such love myself. I learned that, aside from love and trust, a fulfilling relationship begins when two people make their time together their number one priority. If we hope to find love, we must first
find time for loving. Many couples experienced a tragic moment together that taught them to value their time together. How we see our partners often depends on how we are than how they are. We are not audience but participant observers in each others lives.
I used to ask myself where the love between my ex-boyfriend and I had gone. Maybe it's because we forgot that we are the ones who make it. Love was not out there. It was here between my ex and me. Before, I was his as a very sweet, caring, patient, and loyal person. But now it's different. It seemed like I'm the only one who does the loving. he really changed a lot. People really do change. Our hurtful and infantile arguments illustrate how we, instead of looking for love, may look for flaws. We spent the relationship struggling to change others minds. But I realized it a little too late.
We must accept that there are many realities and learn to accept different points of view. My ex then became my eye-opener. he saw what I never could, and do the same for him. We made points of view between the two of us that's totally different from either one of us. he was there with me when it can be too cold or too warm. Both of us were restless, yearning for more than what we had, what we were. Everything was unbalanced and unpredictable. In almost imperfect setting, two not-so-perfect people shared something so very simple---a perfectly imperfect friendship---it's enough. At least he gave me something beautiful to believe in (love and trust).
I have felt so much pain during the relationship with my ex. It was hard to accept that I have loved someone who stopped loving me. Now, I couldn't help ask myself why do I no longer believe those two beautiful ideas (love and trust). Why can't I give myself a chance to be in love again? Maybe I'm just too scared. Or perhaps, maybe because I had been waiting for a perfect moment, a perfect someone, and a perfect me. maybe because I had always felt that beliefs ought to be perfect---ideal, so to speak ugh!
At the end of the day, when all is said and done, loving without being loved back is the best thing to do because feeling so much pain, I learn to heal; knowing so much fear, I learn to stand up to anything, carrying so much sadness, I learn to glorify in joy.
Love is not destroyed by a single failure or won by a single caress. It is a lifetime venture in which we're always learning, discovering and growing.
Lastly, this may be a cliche but there is someone who is right for you (and even for me), and even if he's not, he'd still be right because loving doesn't make sense until you accept it and make it real.
Love: "IF YOU LOSE LOVE, THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT YOU HAVE FAILED IN LOVE. CRY IF YOU HAVE TO, BUT MAKE SURE THAT TEAR WASHES AWAY THE HURT AND THE BITTERNESS THAT THE PAST LEFT YOU WITH. LET GO OF YESTERDAY AND LOVE WILL FIND ITS BACK TO YOU". And when it does, pray that it may be the love that will stay and last a lifetime.
A woman on the rebound could easily fall for sweeping emotions and be made to falsely believe that she finally stumbled upon the right man when what she just found is only someone to cover up for the love she lost . A man who makes promises with words and not with actions may never live up to fulfill them. "IT'S TRUE THAT LOVE CAN WAIT FOREVER BUT IT IS CRAZY TO STUBBORNLY HOPE FOR SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T EVEN CARE OR UNDERSTAND HOW WE FEEL".
"DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME WAITING FOR SOMEONE WHO NEVER REALLY CARED ABOUT HOW YOU WOULD HAVE FELT. OPEN YOUR HEART AGAIN AND GIVE YOURSELF THE CHANCE TO FIND THE MAN WHO WOULD MAKE LOVING WORTH THE PAIN AND THE SACRIFICE." Just like anything else, our love grows weak and extent. Beyond that, it withers without any hope of recovery and soon dies.
God wakes us up in the midst of a storm to teach us a lesson. He takes away people we love, so we can learn to value love itself. He makes us cry so hard so we can see clearly when we open our eyes. He makes us bitter so we can realize that there is no genuine happiness if we think only of our needs and not of others.
Relationships built on jealousy and selfishness is doomed from the very beginning. The hardest part of losing love is letting go and moving on. Most of us cry endlessly over things that could have been but never will be.
"God allows us to experience pain to make us stronger and better persons. He will see us through the most trying and difficult times in our lives and only if we put our trust in Him we can learn to find joy in our tears and happiness in our sorrows".
THERE IS NO FUTURE IN A RELATIONSHIP OF LIES AND SELFISHNESS. It's true, there's life in love . But, there can still be life even after losing love if you leave the past behind and let your heart heal and give you the chance to find yourself again. The success of a relationship lies not only in the beauty of its beginning but in its consistency. Make a choice not on impulse but a decision based on a healthy balance of mind and heart. Let us always remember that "HAPPINESS IS NOT A MATTER OF DESTINY BUT A MATTER OF CHOICE".
"Letting go is a decision that can never be dictated on us. It is a resolve we make ourselves. Acceptance is the key to a
new beginning and time is the healer of all wounds.
"There is nothing wrong in expressing our feelings to someone we love, but "we must always be sensitive to the signals that tell us when to rationalize and be sensible." There comes a time in our lives when we would fall for someone who wouldn't be as interested as we are because his attention is focused on someone else.
Even if the storm casts its fearful shadow, there will always be light after our darkness and lonely moments. There is always a hope for those who believe. There is always a chance for those who try. "Losing someone we may not be a loss at all but a blessing because someone even more is yet to come".
My Happiness
Happiness was indeed hard to find especially if you’re alone and there’s nobody to be there when you need someone. I was one of those people who always sit alone outside their houses looking at the stars and asking theirselves how ironic it was to be happy being single yet emptiness was still there. I’ve been single for about a year and a half I was happy and was always ready to mingle. Sabi ko pa nga “being single gives you an opportunity to taste different kind of delicacies without being punished or thrown to detention”. But as times passes by my perspective about these matters were change.
Let me tell you something about me. How I look at things and how I handle situations using my points of view in life. Way back then I always thought that everything was just a game; if you’re strong enough you win if you’re a sissy you lose. I was a big fan of happily ever after. But now I look at things in different perspective.
I enter every possible relationship trying to find someone who would be brave enough to hold my hand and walk with me and never let me go but as often as it seems I also get out of it broken and devastated. It was 1 year and half when I had my last relationship and after that I was afraid to put myself again in a commitment which at the end I’ll be left behind.
November 7,2010 I have no idea that this was the date that would change my life and will make me have that familiar feeling I had felt a year before. For the first time I saw the guy whom I like to spend my life with. It was indeed abrupt but if you look at this in a different angle you might understand.
Eversince I was 15 years old I was praying for someone who is brave enough to hold my hand and never let me go. I was one of those persons who have a dominant personality and would love to have someone who would not be intimidated by it but instead be more dominant than me. And now he’s here I was overjoyed, I was glad that everything I’ve been waiting for so long is right in front of me.
Ever felt this feeling that you’ve been missing someone for so long that you gave up all your hope then one morning you wake up and find your self beside that person? Or you’ve been wanting something but never really got a chance to have it then one day you went home from school and find a box in your room and inside it was the thing that you’ve been wishing for? That was the same feeling I’m having right now. I can’t really explain further coz if I do I would just burst in tears.
Sabi ko pa nun “This time I knew I’m making the right decision. Siguro naman hindi masamang isipin ko naman ang sarili kong happiness. I’ve been trying to make almost everyone happy maybe this time its my turn. He’s indeed the one that I’ve been praying for. Maybe its time for me to believe again that there is such thing as happily ever after sa mga katulad ko. He’s my prince charming… my Peterpan…”
But unfortunately for me evrything ended….
Let me tell you something about me. How I look at things and how I handle situations using my points of view in life. Way back then I always thought that everything was just a game; if you’re strong enough you win if you’re a sissy you lose. I was a big fan of happily ever after. But now I look at things in different perspective.
I enter every possible relationship trying to find someone who would be brave enough to hold my hand and walk with me and never let me go but as often as it seems I also get out of it broken and devastated. It was 1 year and half when I had my last relationship and after that I was afraid to put myself again in a commitment which at the end I’ll be left behind.
November 7,2010 I have no idea that this was the date that would change my life and will make me have that familiar feeling I had felt a year before. For the first time I saw the guy whom I like to spend my life with. It was indeed abrupt but if you look at this in a different angle you might understand.
Eversince I was 15 years old I was praying for someone who is brave enough to hold my hand and never let me go. I was one of those persons who have a dominant personality and would love to have someone who would not be intimidated by it but instead be more dominant than me. And now he’s here I was overjoyed, I was glad that everything I’ve been waiting for so long is right in front of me.
Ever felt this feeling that you’ve been missing someone for so long that you gave up all your hope then one morning you wake up and find your self beside that person? Or you’ve been wanting something but never really got a chance to have it then one day you went home from school and find a box in your room and inside it was the thing that you’ve been wishing for? That was the same feeling I’m having right now. I can’t really explain further coz if I do I would just burst in tears.
Sabi ko pa nun “This time I knew I’m making the right decision. Siguro naman hindi masamang isipin ko naman ang sarili kong happiness. I’ve been trying to make almost everyone happy maybe this time its my turn. He’s indeed the one that I’ve been praying for. Maybe its time for me to believe again that there is such thing as happily ever after sa mga katulad ko. He’s my prince charming… my Peterpan…”
But unfortunately for me evrything ended….
My Sweetest Downfall
“once i gave you your freedome there’s no turning back you have to learn to accept the fact that sometimes we do silly decision that would not be necessary that would just leave us with scars and regrets… you’re mature now so start deciding for yourself…. i love you so much beng and you have face things alone now wala na ko by your side to tell you what to do or save you when your stranded… its hard but you have to”
Jay Ahr De Guzman
T.T painful???…. yes it is but i have to be strong… beng you’re my sweetest downfall…. i love you so much and i’m sorry
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